Sunday, March 25, 2007

Pillow Fight at Robson Square

Japan has dog fights, Spain has bull fights, Canada has ....pillow fights.
It all started like in an old fashion western movie, all of the sudden what it seemed to be a peaceful crowd took the pillows from their hoisters (and some from their purses) and started hitting each other erratically. The fight did not comply at all with the rules established at the Geneva convention: the press was beaten to feathers, I took several hits while taking these pictures and they used kids as human shields as you can see below. In the process of getting beaten I noticed that the JCPenney line of pillows is much more efficient and more endurant than that of Martha Stuart which quite frankly blowed into a thousand feathers at the first serious hit. The queen of the pillow fight was by far the duckishnikov, the finest in Russian weaponery since the end of the cold war, proving once and for all that foie-gras is not the only useful thing that can be made from ducks.

A group from the Royal Canadian Mountain Police was at the scene in a mission to learn the lost art of pillow combat. They end-up arresting a few members of a small group of animal-rights activists that were interfeering with the pillow fight.

CBC announced during their 6 o'clock news cast that many community centers around Vancouver added to their Yoga and Pilates classes, a self defense agains pillow attack class. Lululemon already announced their new line of recyclable, bio-degradable and naturally compostable pillows that come with a child safety mechanism and, naturally, ergonomically designed to fit in any size purse.

Also many are afraid that the abundance of pillows in the market will increase the domestic violence so the government is puting a motion to limit the number of pillows in the houshold to one regular size pillow per adult and a small size pillow for all children under 18. Before going to bed the owner has to make sure that the pillow is locked in a safe place and that the feathers are separated from the cover.

(well, it should be pretty obvious that all this was a joke, but since I am flattering myself that I am not the only one reading my blog, consider this the official disclaimer)


Raluca said...

Hei Tibilone, am crezut ca citesc ceva news de-adevaratelea, de abia dupa ce am ras o gramada mi-am dat seama ca e scris de tine si ca e blog-ul tau. M-am apucat si eu sa-mi fac unul (ce numai Tibi sa aiba) dar nu stiu daca o sa ma tin de incarcat poze si povesti. Dar cine stie. Cand veniti ma pe aici???????????????????

MB said...

La inceput am crezut ca sint pozele unor emigranti romani dupa o vizita "de lucru" prin blocuri canadiene. Dar mi-am zis, ba, romanii nu sint prosti, ei fura Mercedesuri nu perne folosite si in culori pestrite.

In Israel, spre deosebire de Canada, sint real bullets fights.
Mafiotii nu fac socoteala nimanui si cind se bat intre ei, nu ies fulgi ci ambulante inspre spital, de la locul fight-ului. :-)

Canada e plictisitoare, acum intelegi de ce nu am emigrat? :-)

Cind am fost acolo odata, ti-am mai povestit, am tusit mai magareste in tren. Sa-i vezi pe toti ce au intors capul de parca era un atac chimic in tren. Liniste si pace in frumoasa Canada.
Sau din cind in cind lupte de strada cu perne. :-)